Mum in a Cricket Bag (My first time on YouTube – please forgive me)
This video clip is an example of the lengths I will go to give myself (and others) a giggle. When the going gets tough this old bird doesn’t get going – she just gets sillier! This was filmed (on my son’s iPhone) at a dear friend’s house on Sunday night. With a 5 day old headache and after 4 hours waiting to see my GP (can you believe that wait-time? Actually, can you believe how long that damn headache lasted?) I had finally taken a prescription painkiller which took the edge off the pain (but then gave me an all-over body itch to add insult to injury!) and decided to distract myself from life for a bit. So I jumped in a very large bag supplied by the Australian Cricket Team (where my friend’s hubby works). As you do! The look on her husband’s face was priceless – the sound of my husband chuckling was music to my ears – and the video evidence (uploaded by my son within minutes for all the world to see and have a laugh at my expense) has given me many more chuckles as I relive my own stupidity! Aaaah technology! There’s a lot to be said for the ease at which we can now share fun-times and laughs with our friends, isn’t there?
“If you don’t laugh, you cry. Right?”
And if you do neither, you’re either busy, feeling nothing, or perhaps just doin’ OK, right? Well how often have you been told by well-meaning significant others when you’re facing challenges, that you must simply “think positive”? “Look at your cup as half full instead of half empty?” We might know that in theory that advice is really good, really positive, and probably really helpful in the longer term. But you know what? Sometimes it’s bloody hard to do! Specially when you’re right in thick of it and can’t find much to feel positive about!
Life often deals such a large or continuous amount of crap to some people that you wonder how they may ever laugh again! And to tell them to “Buck up; Chin up soldier; Think positive” while they are in the thick of it – wading through so much effluent they almost need goggles and a snorkel – could be detrimental to your health if you aren’t quick enough to dodge their fist as it comes for your face!
So how do I get through the tough times? Easy! (not) OK, so perhaps I’m just doing what everyone tells us to do and “thinking positive”! And hoping that I will a) Make others feel better around me (10 points for style there!) and b) May even convince myself things are not that bad in the process! But I’ve blogged about this before but I’ll say it again – I just HOPE. That’s one thing no one can take away from us. I hope that just as I never saw this latest ball of crap coming my way (the crap-curve-ball) I also don’t know that there isn’t something equally as fantastic waiting for me just around the next corner! So I tell myself “This too shall pass” and trust that most of the time the things I worry about today will be distant memories this time next year. And in the meantime, hey, you just gotta laugh and do what works for you, don’t you?!
“How are you?”….”Good thanks!” (yeah, right!!)
If you’re going through some major stress (e.g. a potentially life-threatening illness; a death in the family; divorce; major financial stress…anything) and someone asks you how you are hoping for the obligatory false-positive response “I’m good…how are you”, please resist the urge to flatten them when they then proceed to tell you to “be positive”. They mean well. But if you want my advice (and even if you don’t!) and you’re wondering how you can REALLY help someone who’s going through a pretty rough time, this is how. GIVE THEM PERMISSION. Permission to FEEL whatever it is they are feeling at any given moment. Tell them it’s OK to feel like crap some days, and to want to curl up in the fetal position and wallow in self-pity for a while. Just as it’s OK for them to feel positive the next day, silly the next and then maybe go back down again a week later. There will always be good and bad days and to deny yourself expressing your true feelings is not healthy. For those helping someone through some tough times, don’t tell them to “think positive”. Just let them feel it in their own good time. Don’t deny them their right to wallow/chat/cry/laugh. Just be there. Ask them how they are and don’t be disappointed when the answer isn’t always “Good thanks”!
Give yourself permission – feel what you feel – hit rock bottom. That way you can then paddle your way back up to the surface of the pool because by actually touching the bottom you’ve also given yourself a good kick-off and can get back up to the top again – where you can take an other deep breath and do it all over again if/when required!
So if you’re feeling a bit flat today and want a giggle again (yes, at my expense) – click on the image above and see what a middle-aged midget in an Australian Cricket Bag looks like! Go on! You know you want to! We might as well laugh at ourselves – especially when everyone else is!
Keep smiling (if you feel like it!). And if you don’t – that’s OK too!