People-Watching: A skill or hobby?

We ALL do it! Don’t we? Sit in a cafe, airport, bus or train station and watch the passing parade? Passing judgement on others, wondering where they are going, if they’re happy, what they do for a living, etc etc? Well what if this common pastime actually was part of your job (as it is mine) and you found yourself honing those skills to such a degree that your perceived accuracy actually scared you at times?! That’s me, and as fun as it can be, I shock myself at how quickly I use my image-management skills to sum up complete strangers. Ofcourse, no one is ever 100% sure or 100% accurate, but I do surprise myself at how talented I appear to be in this field sometimes!

I practice these skills without knowing I am doing it – daily, everywhere I go, with everyone I meet (or even don’t meet!). It helps me in my work as I am able to instantly work out what I do/don’t like about the clothes I buy for my clients, and the communication skills, postures, walking styles etc that I teach/coach my clients.

Do you judge a book by it’s cover? OFCOURSE you do! We all do! It’s a basic human survival instinct to be able sum up a person or situation on face-value. To decide if a person, place or thing is safe. To decide if we have something in common or wish to get to know them better. But summing up strangers is based on SO much more than judging them on their physical appearance/clothing choices. It’s a big part of it, yes. But not ALL that you take in when you first meet someone. They way they walk, the speed they walk, their posture, eye-contact, body language, grooming, they way they hold their head, the expression on their face, their speech, their shoes, the list goes on and on. Yet we usually can’t define exactly WHICH of those things had the most influence on us/helped us sum them up most.

I sat in a bar in the middle of the city yesterday – after a 9 hour shopping session with a client. I was exhausted and just had to sit. I ordered a glass of Sav Blanc and sat waiting for my husband to pick me up. I had 45 minutes of blissfully, uninterrupted people-watching time! I played a game with myself as I sipped. I challenged myself to assign a one word (two at most) description of each person as they hurried by. It was 5.3opm. A Friday night in the heart of the city, so no shortage of people to work on, I can assure you!

Here’s a summary of some of my quick Life/Style Snapshots:

#1 – Middle-aged Man : – Pace – Fast  (probably racing to catch his bus/train). Works – City office. Not a workaholic – probably just works to pay the bills and would rather be somewhere else most of the time. Clocks off on time, if not as early as he can. Maybe in banking/finance. Attire – Half a suit. Conservative. Chunky shoes – unpolished and worn well. Not into fashion. Probably can’t wait to get out of his work gear & get into shorts/tee. Personal-life – Happy. Married. Kids. Dog.

#2 Tourists – Husband, wife, child: Pace – Slow; On holidays & possibly been shopping all day. Will probably continue shopping until 9pm after dining in FoodHall (Broadway) or perhaps Jo Jo’s or another local eatery. All hail from either down south (& loving our summer humidity?!) or from further north/country or coast. Attire: All wearing thongs, shorts, tees. Carrying many shopping bags (clearly enjoying all the choice of shops in the big smoke) & will probably walk back to nearby hotel or catch a train to their accommodation with friends or family.

#3 Goth – Male. Approx 21. Long, heavy military style trench coat (in 33 degrees? Is he mad? …clearly!). Short-shaven hair – tattoo on neck (and if not wearing a long coat, probably in numerous other places). Black doc-martens. Black skinny-skinny jeans. Smoker. Pace – even. Expression – None. Looks quite troubled and unhappy to be honest!

#4 – Elegant Young Woman: Works – City. Young exec going places & wants to be noticed. Possibly working in PR/Advertising or some other creative industry. Attire: Well-groomed, classic pencil skirt & fashionable top – both black. Bright fluoro orange 10″ stiletto pumps (yet walks quite well and confidently in them!) Long blonde hair – spends a lot of money maintaining colour/style. Story: Possibly walking back to the office – not home, as not yet carrying a handbag. Appears very confident. Knows people look at her and knows she looks good. Upwardly mobile.

#4 – Loner – Woman, mid-30’s.  Appearance: Overweight, greying hair, no makeup. Hair pulled back in ponytail. Black pants, flat sensible shoes, polyester 3/4 sleeve black top. Attractive but will hazard a bet to say she really doesn’t see herself that way at all. Not confident about her appearance but probably very capable and intelligent. Works:  Government Department. Maybe IT. Pace  – medium – Perhaps walking back to work (again, no handbag or personal belongings which makes me think she’s on her way back to work and not home yet).

SO WHAT’S YOUR STORY? What do you think YOUR image is telling the world? You see, every single one of us has a story. A past, a present, a future. A family. Friends. Issues. Skills. Baggage. And our “outer packaging” (the cover of your book) is  the way we choose to be “judged”. Who you are on the inside is often a direct reflection of that story and affects how you choose to display your story! Sometimes our outside clearly reflects our inner turmoil. Sometimes we look really “together” on the outside as a way of masking our insecurity (or perhaps ill-health?); sometimes we can actually see/feel the weight of the world on someone’s shoulders and yet we don’t even know them!

Think about your image and the story you tell – is it working for you? Do you feel good about you and are the stories “IN SYNC”? I’ll leave you to ponder….